I envy married people & people with boyfriends. Partners. In crime. Together. I know they are not perfect & I know their lives are not perfect but I am jealous. I am a jealous person because I long for that. For a someone.
Even these young kids, younger than me. Married & I can’t help wondering where I went wrong. Why was I not that lucky? Should I just have stuck it out? Grinned and beared it? I feel alone. I am alone.
I want to be a someone to someone. I miss it. I miss everything. The sex. The hand holding. The laughs. I miss it all & what if I never find it? What if I am supposed to be alone forever?
I have these scenarios in my head. Played out daily. That I’ll meet someone & it will be all I ever wanted but how long is that day going to take? Months? Years? I don’t mind waiting but I am getting more alone now than before. I just miss having someone to talk to. Someone to share things with. Someone who is interested. I miss having a person. And I am jealous. Of all these young married people, these happy and not so happy married people. I am jealous. Of you. I am jealous. Because I want that. I miss that.
I am jealous. I am envious. I am alone, & I miss that. I miss you
*disclaimer: all pictures are courtesy of pinterest, facebook,tumblr & 9gag*