Uncategorized

Late Night Thoughts

I’m hardly awake at this time in the evening but it seems,that tonight I have a vast ocean of annoying thoughts swimming around. I apologise for ALL my spelling mistakes but I am laying down in bed and I am a tad bit tired.

Let’s go.

I feel stuck. I wanna do something bigger than this. I wanna be somebody. I want to own my own business. I want to be my own boss. I want to be a success. I just want to do better than what I’m doing right now. More motivated. More out there. No excuses.

I feel stuck. I am so super duper overweight. 1.49cm tall and 73kgs heavy. I am so fat and I just can’t stop eating. I vow to wake up and work out but ai,as if. Forever oversleeping.

I feel stuck. I am such a perfectionist and it’s killing me. Everything must always be perfect but here I sit like an obese unhappy clown but die lewe gaan aan.

I feel stuck. I am so unhappy. Like right now,in this moment but I am unable to cry.

I feel stuck. I want love,man love. I’m scared though,that I might just jump onto the first dick I see. I want to be noticed. I want to be wanted. I want that ridiculous movie kinda kiss,where it’s all passionate and lustfull.

I feel stuck. I wanna fuckin vent! Like scream my fuckin lungs out,get drunk and just cry. Just fuckin cry and clean,and just fuckin figure out what the hell is going on because I am so lost.

I feel stuck. I need to and want to be a better mother to my daughter but I don’t know how because she is so much like me – stubborn as a rock!

I feel stuck…….and alone. Lonely. Sad. Alone. All the time. Sad. All the time. Afraid. Doubtful.

I feel stuck. I’m suppose to do my learners this month and I don’t want to and can’t fail. I think I will.

I feel stuck.

I am Athena.
I am 26 years old.
I have a daughter.
I am a fulltime working and partime studying single mother.

I am not happy. I am not ok. I am stuck

image

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s